whoops

i havent updated in forever.
i told my mom the other day i didn't want to go to school anymore. and she flipped of course. i mean, i kind of do and kind of dont. it would be great if there wasnt homework and essays and all the stuff that actually makes school what it is. i just still don't know exactly what i want to do. im still going to go to school no matter what. i dont know why i feel the need to freak my mom out like that hahahaha. amanda at work was asking me how i am so calm about everything bc she is kind of in the same situation. and i told her i'm not. which is true. i'm just the kind of person who has internal freak outs about things and then explodes about it months later. fun fun.

i went out to dinner with juan last night and we were talking about how we are turning 23 this year. which seems really weird so obviously we are just still going to tell people we are turning 21 again for the third time. haha. we were also talking about how sometimes when people ask us how old we are we kind of have a brain fart about it. i guess all those days when people used to ask what you have been doing with your life are over. i'm still waiting for the opportunity to come along where some asshole from high school comes along and ask me what i have been doing since then and i get to share that i have been an alcoholic and spent the last 3 years trying to get myself off the crack. mainly bc i think it would be great to see the look on their face. haha bc honestly do they care? no. i don't know why they bother to go out of their way. i find that the best thing is to ignore these people at all costs and hope that they are "pretending" not to know who the fuck you are as well.

katie's fiancee thing (gross) came into my job the other day. and i got all the way through the entire transaction and then BAM. there it came. "hey, don't you remember me?" and i was like "yeah,..... i know who you are" and then we had a lame 2 second conversation about how they are moving and how they are getting married in july. katie and i would probably still be friends if it weren't for him and the weirdo people she started hanging around with. i mean seriously, did he expect me to strike up a fabulous conversation with him and act like we were best friends back in the day or something? what do people want from me?

tonight i feel all sickly. i think it has to do with the lack of fruits and vegetables in my diet for the past two weeks. agh i sound like a grandpa but it's true. probably that and the fact that i have been working 6 days straight... hmm that might have something to do with it as well.